The event at the MCG yesterday was undeniably great – it was loaded with wonderful heart and goodwill. But the cricket match was disappointing. I think the reason it was disappointing is to do with the way the teams were demarcated. Rather than being Asia v The rest of the world it should really have been The world v The rest of the world. The teams should have been selected 10 minutes prior to the start of the game by the two captains. All the players should have gathered together at the centre of the ground, a bat thrown in the air and Ganguly should have called ‘hills’ or ‘valleys‘, the landing of the bat determining who would choose first. For instance:

GANGULY: Brian.
PONTING: Then, Gilly.
GANGULY: Ok, Kumar.
PONTING: Murali!
GANGULY: Then I’ll take Warnie.
PONTING: Virender, you’re with us.
GANGULY: Rahul. You are my god, you must be on my team.
PONTING: Cairnsie.
GANGULY: Zaheer.
PONTING: Anil Kumble.
GANGULY: Daniel.
PONTING: Sanath, with us.
GANGULY: Matty Hayden.
PONTING: Next one… um, Yousuf, cool.
GANGULY: Mr Gayle, you are on my team.
PONTING: Flemo.
GANGULY: Razza.
PONTING: Chaminda.
GANGULY: Sorry Rick, McGrath’s all yours – Goughie.

Having a world team competing in a cricket match is also good for the cricket writers who get to pen sentences that include grand fragments such as this- ‘the world was breathing more comfortably when Sourav Ganguly, the captain, drove to Gough at mid-off.’

At one point hundreds of small beach balls burst out of one section of the crowd and spread quickly throughout the Great Southern Stand.

Earlier a naked lady spent an extended period flying and zooming over the heads of the same spectators, dipping into the mass here and there only to launch immediately back into the lower stratas of the atmosphere once more, swooping & dipping in graceful arcs.