McGrath, famous not only for his muttering on the pitch but also his (more eloquent and incisive) muttering in the lead up to big series, has begun his ashes campaign early. Though admirable his efforts pale in comparison to those described by Grantlee Kieza from the Sunday Telegraph (article not freely available online):

“Jonah” Jones was Australia’s best fast bowler in the years between the Demon Spofforth and Tibby Cotter. Decades before Steve Waugh’s stormtroopers wrote the manual on sledging, the Broken Hill Catapult would row out to meet ships bringing England players to Fremantle. Megaphone cupped to his big mouth and his voice booming like a crowd’s roar, he’d shout “100 to one England for the Tests” or “you blokes haven’t got a chance”.

Next time some cricket team comes to tour Australia I want to see McGrath, Hayden, Warne and amicable colleagues lining the fence at the arrivals gate, taking part in a hell of a lot of soul destroying muttering – perhaps dressed in stormtrooper uniforms and certainly with megaphones. Placards with arrows on them pointing the way to the departure lounge, witty muttering to the rough point that the tourists would be better off not wasting everybody’s time.